Parenting Fail of the Week:Kids MMA, Why Not?
No biting. No eye-gouging. No elbows or blows to the head when the opponent is on the ground. These are the only rules to America’s fastest growing children’s sport – Kids Mixed Martial Arts. This rising activity teaches children important life lessons from leadership and self-defense to emergency first aid. And yet prissy PTA moms claim MMA is human cockfighting.
Seriously? A War Over Macaroni Salad
We’ve all been at block parties where someone’s putrid blob of macaroni salad sits in the sun for a good 15 hours. And no one says anything. Should someone say something? Should the Gestapo (aka the Homeowner’s Association) get involved if a taco salad isn’t up to par? Read this utterly hilarious email chain about [...]
The Worst Free Family Websites We’ve Ever Seen, Ever
So you want to create a free family website that a) is easy-to-use and b) makes your kids look smarter, prettier, and better adjusted than your neighbor’s snot-nosed preschooler who can’t even tie his own shoes. That’s what family blogs are all about right? Showing off your kids and their talents? But a free family [...]
A Mother’s Guide to Surviving the Fall Sports Season
It’s cold, it’s long and it’s boring. Watching kids runs around a field in the rain, gray, cold has to be one of the most painful experiences of parenthood both physically and mentally. Physically sitting on those hard benches, both cold, hard metal and wood, feeling your core body temperature dip from being outside, and [...]
Rootin’ Tootin’ Toddler Shootin’
What’s more awesome? Learning how to blow away bad guys at the age of two, or sporting the skinhead with denim shorts look just like Daddy. Looks like little Johnny has the best of both worlds. It’s too bad he’s not old enough to remember it yet.
Parenting Fail of the Week: What Is This Costume Even Supposed To Be (Other Than Skanky)?
Congratulations Mrs. and Mr. Cyrus. You have succeeded in parenting not one, but two of the nation’s sluttiest celebrity children. Sure, ol’ Miley left some grandiose slut-tastic shoes to fill, but nine-year-old Noah Cyrus can now claim title of Most Promiscuously Dressed Quasi-Famous Child Star At A Public Event. This little number was introduced at [...]
The Soccer Mom’s Guide to Fighting like a Hockey Mom
Ah soccer moms, the gentle moms of the sporting moms world. Clad in velour or terry cloth jogging suits a visor or hat, manicures and sensible shoes, they dot the sidelines of any soccer game, having arrived in an SUV of course. But what happens when things get ugly on the sidelines? Nevermind what is [...]
Caught in the Act? 6 Things Never to Say
The candles are lit. The satin sheets are out. Ok, scratch that. You’re a parent. The candles burned out when the baby popped out. You have 15 minutes to get busy. And then, Little Johnny (bless his heart) bursts through the door during an exceptionally primal scene. Johnny screams like he’s been shot. You both [...]
Parenting Fail of the Week: Beer Bong Boy
Ah, beach-going: the waves, the sand, the bikini-clad bombshells, the guys with washboard abs, the little kids doing beer bong hits. Yes, you heard me right. But you know what, this is just a natural progression for young moms and dads who never kicked their college drinking habits. Don’t judge them. They’re keeping their son [...]
What Cereal Choice Says About Your Parenting Style
A recent report says the worst cereals for kids are the ones most heavily marketed. That’s just more nonsense from the parent puss club. Seriously, what does ‘worst’ really mean? These cereals give kids enough energy to dash to the bus stop, but are scientifically formulated to help crash their energy when they’re in the [...]