5 Reasons All Children Should Drink (and As Soon As Possible)
America has a MAJOR problem. Our children don’t drink. Consequently, they grow up fascinated by the mystique of alcohol and, at first opportunity, go out and act like jackasses on spring break, playing strip Jenga whilst licking cheap tequila off Mexican hookers. Do you want your son or daughter playing strip Jenga whilst licking cheap [...]
Applebee’s Screws Up, Toddler Gets Drunk
Last week, Taylor Dill-Reese and her Detroit-area family went out to dinner at Applebee’s just like any other unsuspecting suburban family would on a Friday night. However, she got an unexpected surprise after ordering a drink for her one-year-old son, Dominick…
Top 5 Teenage Sensation Failures
As awesome as it would be to have your kid become famous so you could exploit him or her for your booze budget, the kid’s livelihood is probably more important. The rise and fall of fame can take a huge toll on teenage sensations and some haven’t been so lucky.
MTV Skins Causes Teens to Rejoice, Parents to Panic
MTV Skins recently premiered and it’s gotten parents freaking out. Sampa asks: what’s the big fuss about?
Jersey Shore Season 3, and Other Reasons Why Reality TV is Ruining Parenting
The year 2011 is finally upon us. With groundbreaking inventions like the Shakeweight, iRenew, and Shamwow in our midst, we truly are living in the most modern of times. Despite these incredible advancements in human lifestyle, there is one distinct area that has regressed significantly in recent years: parenting. That’s right, in just a few [...]
10 Totally Horrible Baby Names Not to Give Your Child
Unless you live under a rock, you know someone with a unique, scary, or just downright funny name. Hell, maybe you are that person. I’m not talking about the slap on the knee, “isn’t that clever” names like Justin Case, Junior Smith, Jr., or some villain spin off from a James Bond movie. I’m talking [...]
Jennifer Petkov Sucks – Do Something About It
At some point, all of us have been subject to torment from a-hole neighbors: they let their dog poop freely all over your lawn. They look the other way when their a-hole kid tee-pees your house. Or worse, they join them in the prank. They call the police on your for everything. Rowdy scramble game? [...]
Child-Proof your iPhone 4 with Woogie
Replace your cyber sorrows with a Woogie – the six-armed plush iPhone case. Feed into your children’s incurable need for instant gratification as they thrash this plush squid into the ground during another heart-thumping round of Fruit Ninja.
Scarface School Play: Genius or School Fail?
You know what’s funny about the Scarface School Play? You were willing to watch it. For a second there… you were almost entertained. Can’t all school plays be like this?
Parenting Fail: Little Boy Left at Little Caesars
There’s bad parenting, the funny kind and then there’s bad parenting that makes you want to weep. Imagine being left at your own birthday party at Little Cesears. Sure, the Crazy Bread is darn delicious. But that Little Caesars guy looks like he would eat a child. And it’s no Chuckie Cheese. One couple managed [...]