WTF Is A Sampa?

Welcome to the bad parenting advice blog!

Meet the Sampa family. We’re a possibly inbred, possibly certifiable family from Hoboken, New Jersey. Family values? We have none. This is the place to discuss imperfect parenting. We’ll give you advice on what to do when your child finds your sex toy, where to hide the booze from your thirsty teenagers, and how to turn your son into the playground badass.

It’s the unsaid stuff of parenting, written by a mom once ostracized from a play group for saying “dildo” in front of a few rosy-cheeked infants. (To my defense, the babies couldn’t even walk yet, let alone coo the “offensive” term.) Three things I hate: OCD parenting, mini-van moms, and the farmer’s market.

Sensitive suburban mothers, this blog ain’t for you. Tune in for killer toy rants, hilarious parenting fails, the latest Oprah Said, and of course, really bad parenting advice.

The Sampa family embraces parents who fell off the pedestal and hit their heads a little too hard on the way down. Call us what you will. We won’t tell you how to be perfect. We will tell you how to be awesome.